Monthly Archives: August 2011

Sadhana And Pankaj Dalal

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How and where I know Sameer
Since my daughter’s marriage

Message:
Dear Narenbhai, Neenaben and family,

The news of Sameer’s untimely passing was shocking and left me tongue-tied, speechless and wordless. I knew him for a short while but it was long enough to experience his personality, genius and other great attributes. You could not help but feel his presence the minute he would walk in to the room. He had that aura about him which was so unique, that you would feel his presence even if he did not utter a single word. He carried himself very well, graceful, smiling, and always impeccably dressed.

Though, I knew him little but I knew a lot about him and that was from his parents, cousins, and my daughter. This is only true about the persons who give their love, care, and share their knowledge with the persons whose lives they touch. Each day till today I have thought about him, and how difficult it would be for Narenbhai and Neenaben. No words or acts will reduce their sorrow. May god give them the strength to endure the sorrow. In front of the God’s wish; we the human are so vulnerable. As it is said in Jain, “panchmo aaro kathin chhe ane ishwaer ichha same manvi nu kashoonj chaltu nathi”. I wish I had known him while he was growing up.

There is nothing which will replace his love and care for his children, Surekha, Shalin, Tua and all the relatives. We all have lost an irreplaceable pillar that was inspirational to all of us. I know I have not reduced your sorrow but both Sadhana and I do share your pain….
Sameer touched our lives, he shall not be forgotten, he is not gone, he is with us in our hearts and shall live in our hearts throughout our life. At this moment I think of a famous Guajarati song “ o neel gagan na pankheru …”
“MUKESH – O NEEL GAGAN NA PANKHERU- A Beautiful Gujarati Song-1949 – YouTube
Sadhana and Pankaj Dalal

Greg Van De Mosselaer

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When I met Sameer: 06/01/2001

Where Sameer and I spent time:
We would meet periodically in Florida when we would visit his brother and sister in law and their family.

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
His sense of humor and keen intellect coupled with a boyish charm that made him instantly likable and engaging.

Extended thoughts about Sameer.

Sameer was full of surprises.

We are from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. We were surprised to learn on our first meeting with Sameer that it was our home town that made him the most eager to meet us. It seems that as a child in sunny Florida he used to dream and scheme of one day running an air transportation multinational company. After extensive research and planning he had settled on Winnipeg as the hub and set to work acquiring and encyclopedic knowledge of the city. Being from a smaller town and knowing from Tuya what a kidder he could be we were naturally suspicious that he was pulling our leg until he settled down and laid out everything he knew (and we did not) about Winnipeg.

He seized on Tuya and Shalin’s first trip together to Winnipeg to tag along. Once in town he set to work making pilgrimages to all of the notable landmarks and locations that he had read about in his youth. He engaged eagerly in a local multicultural festival called Folklorama and would grin broadly at some of the more campy performances along side his brother and sister-in-law. He had an ability to enjoy life and a lightness of being that was very evident.

Another coincidence that gave me personally a great deal to discuss with Sameer was our shared interest in the writer, George Orwell. We both had despite not being involved in any literary field possessed great interest in his writings and had both read his complete works. Sure many people heard or read of Animal Farm or 1984 but to sit down with someone who like me could discuss Orwell’s less well known but equally significant works in detail was a real treat. If you want to get inside Sameer’s head I suggest reading Burmese Days or Coming Up For Air. Orwell’s razor sharp insight into how the world is and melancholy for how life could be obviously struck a chord with Sameer.

I have since our time together always tried to catch glimpses of him as life and family floated us around. Everybody gets busy with their own things. That is the way life is. I will miss him but I am glad to have known such an authentic person. I wish we had all had more time to enjoy his company and good humour.

Lee Kempler

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When I met Sameer: Feb 1986

Where Sameer and I spent time: McKinsey

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer: His unwavering sense of right and wrong

Extended thoughts about Sameer. 

The news of Sameer’s passing shocked me into silence. For three weeks, I have thought about him, his life, our experiences together, and the ways our lives came together, moved apart, and occasionally came together again. Twenty five years later, I work in the very same office building where Sameer and I initially worked together. And I have been at a loss for words to explain what Sameer meant to me or how to come to grips with his passing. Today, through a completely random e-mail, I saw the following quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson:

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children… to leave the world a better place… to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

This struck me as a pretty good description of our friend Sameer. A success, indeed.

Supriya Desai

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Manan and I recently exchanged a note about our wonderful memories of ‘running away’ to NYC with Sameer and my best friend, Julie, so many years ago. That memory never fails to make me smile but thinking of it after Sameer’s death helped me remember that it was he who encouraged our rebellion! And now I’m laughing with the memory of this person who so subtly shook things up that it took me 25 years or more to realize it!!! Now that’s a life well lived that he’s given me a whole new source of joy even though he’s not on this earth anymore.

I hope you’re both finding yourselves able to cope and find solace in ways that mean something to you. There is a poem by Sufi mystic Rumi that says we must just let all the emotions that visit us come and stay as long as they will, not to resist, not to feel you should feel any different than you do. I believe it with all my heart and his wisdom has helped me through some profound losses in my life. I will send the poem shortly to your house in Florida.

James Bates ’86

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When I met Sameer:  1982

Where Sameer and I spent time:  Amherst College

Extended thoughts about Sameer. 

FAST as the rolling seasons bring
The hour of fate to those we love,
Each pearl that leaves the broken string
Is set in Friendship’s crown above.
As narrower grows the earthly chain,
The circle widens in the sky;
These are our treasures that remain,
But those are stars that beam on high.

O. W. Holmes

 

Farewell my Amherst Brother!

Your kindness, your grace, and your smile will remain in our hearts forever.

Anna S. Choi

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When I met Sameer:  09/01/1982

Where Sameer and I spent time 

I knew Sameer at Amherst College where we both went to school. I didn’t know him very well but I do remember him being a whiz at the subjects I didn’t do too well in (Economics, math, etc). Though I wasn’t friends with him, I always knew him as a super nice guy, very smart, very friendly, really committed to his work, always smiling.

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer

I didn’t get to know him very well at Amherst but I did see him and his beautiful family at our Amherst Reunion in May. He looked great and for those of us with young kids, I really appreciated him bringing his kids. He obviously loved his family and was a great father to them as well as being a wonderful husband. I am deeply saddened by his death mostly for his family. I hope his children realize what a wonderful man they had in their father.

Marcia King

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When I met Sameer:  09/03/1979

Where Sameer and I spent time: Satellite High School, class of 1982

Extended thoughts about Sameer. 
Dear Shah Family,
I went to Satellite with Sameer and had several classes with him. I’m not sure how I had ANY classes with him, as he was brilliant and I was academically average. Sameer was without a doubt the smartest person in our graduating class and quite likely the smartest person I’ve ever been lucky enough to know. While his brilliance is important what is more important is his kindness. Sameer always had a kind word and a smile on his face. He always made you feel that he was happy to see you. I am so saddened that his children will not get to grow up with him and that he left them so prematurely. My prayers are with his family.

William Guzak

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When I met Sameer:  Early 1970s

Where Sameer and I spent time:  Ocean Breeze Elementary, Hoover Junior High School, and Satellite High School

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
He was a good friend throughout our primary education. He smiled alot even back then, especially when he was winning.

Extended thoughts about Sameer. 
Sameer and I competed on grades all through our primary education. As seen on my handwritten 5th grade rankings, he always came out on top. The winner in Mr. Deith’s 5th grade class got to ride a small pedal car that Mr. Deith built around the school track. I remember Sameer smiling the whole way around the track. If I remember correctly the rest of us in the top 5 just got to sit in it. I remember that science project (picture in the photo gallery) that he did at Hoover. Everyone knew that Sameer would win. I remember the candy business that Josh Litwin mentioned in his remarks. Sameer and William Fitzgerald were partners in that endeavor. I believe they called their business Shah-Fitz Enterprises. You notice that Shah is mentioned first. It was a booming business that made alot of money that had to be shut down by the administration due to its popularity. In fourth grade I remember Sameer and I grading papers for Mrs. Knoll. We even competed doing that by seeing who could grade the most papers the fastest. Sameer came up with a war game in elementary school that we played on a piece of paper. First you would create a map with land and sea areas. Then you would place your artillery, tanks, and ships on the map one turn at a time. You would take shots by placing the tip of your pencil on where you were firing from and flicked the pencil back to fire. If the resulting pencil lead trace hit the enemies object then it would be destroyed or partially destroyed. This would lead to many debates as to whether your object was hit and how bad. Sameer won most of those debates. I do not remember beating him once. I came close one time but he prevailed again and smiled. Teachers would have to tell us to put the game away all the time.

I regret very much not keeping in touch with Sameer after high school. Sameer was one of a kind and I realize now that you should keep people like Sameer a part of your life. Sameer and I did start to reconnect last year when he joined facebook. I was looking forward to seeing him again.

Lisa Weyl Wyler

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When I met Sameer: 09/01/1989

Where Sameer and I spent time:  Stanford GSB

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
I will always remember and appreciate Sameer’s infectious laugh, his warm smile and his joy for life.

Extended thoughts about Sameer
Sameer was instantly recognizable on campus — with his array of button down shirts, sun glasses and his broad smile.

Sameer was an amazing traveler of the world. He could be put down anywhere on the earth, given a map in any language and quickly identify what there was to explore, get there by the indigenous forms of transportation (camel, Rolls Royce, rickshaw), experience the highlights and lowlights (rice paddies, plains of Africa, Taj Mahal) and come away with a very confident perspective about the place, politics and economic opportunities.

Sameer loved to engage in fun spirited discussion — his intellectual arguments based on voracious reading and keen intelligence were hard to “one-up” — studying up on previous Economist magazines helped even the playing field (a little) and Sameer always enjoyed a good debate.

Sameer loved his mom, dad and brother immeasurably – and he felt deeply loved and basked in the love of his family. He was immensely proud – of his education, employers, friends and most of his family.

When I saw Sameer at our last reunion I believe Surekha was at home expecting birth of their first baby. Sameer was beaming with joy and pride – so in love and already so proud of what his children would accomplish in the world.

Sameer was a unique amazing human being and it was a great privilege to have been his friend. I am so sorry about this terrible tragedy, and extend my love and prayers to Surekha and the Shah family.

Lawrence Lee

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When I met Sameer: 09/1989

Where Sameer and I spent time: Stanford Graduate School of Business

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
I will always remember Sameer as a real gentleman. He was very smart and carried himself well, never losing his balance even in the face of intense competition. I am honored to have known Sameer and be in the same class with him.

Patricia Nakache

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When I met Sameer: 09/15/1987

Where Sameer and I spent time

First we worked together at McKinsey in the New York office as Business Analysts. Then we were classmates at Stanford Business School.
What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
I remember most his wide, beautiful smile and the way his shoulders would shake when he laughed. I appreciated his thoughtfulness, his love of debate and intellectual honesty, and how he liked to enjoy himself.

Extended thoughts about Sameer. Please write as much as you like.
I have many wonderful memories of Sameer. As Business Analysts in NY, he was the one who would rally us all to go out to dinner after a late night of work (paid for, of course, by McKinsey). He always looked so dapper in his suits and spoke so eloquently; he seemed to be a born consultant. But then at Stanford, he chucked the suits and donned his dark sunglasses, and seemed equally at home in the heart of silicon valley. He was always impressive in the classroom, yet he was also very social and loved a good party.

Between our first and second year, a small group of us went on a study trip to South Africa. Just prior to going to South Africa, three of us joined Sameer in visiting his cousins in Kenya and going on a safari. He and his extended family were wonderful, generous hosts.

I will always remember his smile, his calm and in many ways sophisticated demeanor, and his intellectual curiosity. He was a good friend and I will miss him.

Dilip Karia and Family friends

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Dear narenbhai, neenaben and family,

Frankly, i dont know how to start and what to write.

I can understand (and dread) the pain and agony of helplessness you all are going
through. We have gone through similar circumstances when Parag and me lost our father,
very suddenly, back in1985. It was very hard for us to believe and accept, and for a
long time, we always felt that he had gone out of town and would return soon.
Nothing i say may help you feel better or lighter at the moment, but what people told us at
that time was (although not at all fair) that maybe GOD needed him more than us. Every
now and then ,they say, GOD needs good souls for himself and he selects them from
amongst us, maybe because he has something special planned for them. something
better something supreme which us mortals cannot comprehend.
ગુજરાતી માં આપડે કહીએ કે ” એ પાવન જીવ ને પ્રભુ એ સંસાર ના સુખ દુખ થી મુક્ત કરી મોક્ષ ની
પ્રાપ્તિ કરાવી . એમની પાસે બોલાવી ને એમના માં લીન કર્યો

and that is why we were advised to let him go for GOD had better plans for him

But how can we let him go.  Sameer is always going to be there with you, in your heart,
in your soul as a part of you and you will always treasure and cherish the time he has
spent with you and that, mind you, NO ONE NOT EVEN GOD CAN TAKE IT AWAY
FROM YOU.

When my father expired, my grand father was still there and looking at my mom and us
so young, he stood there firm as a rock inspite of the unbearable weight of losing his son
so early in life, when he himself was still alive,,,  we pray Lord Almighty to give you both,
the strength and courage, as HE gave him, to withstand this irreparable loss and be there
as a rock solid support, for surekha, the kids and shalin and his family, to lean upon
during this terrible ordeal.

Please convey our heartfelt condolences to surekha, shalin & his wife and love to the kids.

We, (mummy, myself-binita-kinnari, parag-avani-kanav) pray lord Almighty to rest his soul

in peace. jai jinendra, jaishri krishna

dilip

Aashish Gandhi

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When I met Sameer:  04/10/1999

Sameer and I first met at Naren uncle’s 60th Birthday Party.

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer

While my interaction with him was very limited throughout the years, I remember his calm and collected tone and the manner in which he conveyed his thoughts.

Extended thoughts about Sameer. Please write as much as you like.

I don’t even know how to offer my condolences to Naren uncle and Neena aunty. They have always been like my parents. I can only imagine what my parents and family would have gone through if I hadn’t survived an acute system shutdown on 7/29/2011.

Neena aunty, I have always seen you cheerful, smiling, and giving us the right advice when needed. I know this is an extremely difficult moment for all of us, but please take care of uncle and yourself.

Pankaj And Kalpana Desai Lady Lake Fl

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Our Dear Narenbhai and Ninaben,

Namaste!!

Kalpana and I were very saddened to hear your beloved Sameer’s death.

I never had an occassion to meet him but the wonderful things we heard from Asvinbhai, Arunabhabhi and all, and What a great son you raised I can only surmise.

It is said when your spouse dies, you lose your present and future; and when your child dies, you lose your Past, Present and future. Those words of wisdom!!!

Now that Sameer is gone , all future special occasions will be forever changed. Visiting NYand NJ and on the phone and not having to talk with “Sameer”, not seeing his ever handsome, smiling face can not be imagined. The sharing of life’s unique and special events will never again take place. No matter how good a relationship may have been, the survivor often believes it should have been better, causing guilt.

Despite the physical distance that may separate us as adults, this bond of blood and friendship provided protection of Son. And certainly we can make it better by thinking about them; talk about them; remember them at special times such as birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries.

So often as adults, our relationship has changed from younger years. Each travels a separate path, and sometimes communication is lacking and or absent, with ambivalent feelings about maintaining the relationship surface. Even One’s own mortality is often questioned in the aftermath of such loss. So It is also natural for the surviving Parents to look at their own lives and question how many years they have left, and what their deaths would do to the family.

But let us make a resolve to stay in touch regularly, so we will find positive changes, frequent positive communication within our own lives. Let us celebrate Sameer’s life and wonderful memories then get down with the grief as he did not suffer too much and lived a wonderful, glorious albeit short life.

So please accept our sincere condolences in your bereavement and may god grant you the strength to bear this loss.

With Pranams and Warmest regards to Surekha,Shailin and familyl and hugs to you all.

Pankaj, Kalpana, Raj, Rishi and Rupal.

Kathryn Bowsher

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When I met Sameer:  9/89

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
Centered and Joyful … just plain fun to be around

Extended thoughts about Sameer. Please write as much as you like.
My heart goes out to everyone who is feeling his loss in their daily lives.

Nancy Geisse Pile

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When I met Sameer:  08/1989

Where Sameer and I spent time

Sameer and I were housemates at Stanford Bschool in 1989- 1990. We also traveled to Africa together as part of a very small group studying the South African government in the summer of 1990- just 6 months after Nelson Mandela was released from prison. (In fact, I have a photo of Sameer with Mr. Mandela. I will try to find it and post it.)

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer
His fantastic laugh. I used to hear that through the walls of our poorly made rental house in Menlo Park. Loved it. (I also used to hear the walls vibrate from his snoring but that’s another story.)

I also remember how friendly he was to everyone. Sameer had no enemies in bschool and was well like by all.

I also remember how we was always in a good mood. Each day he had a bright smile on his face and was so quick to laugh. He could brighten up any room- and he did.

Extended thoughts about Sameer. Please write as much as you like.
Sameer and I have kept in touch but only periodically. I would see him when he would visit and we’d check in by phone occasionally. We spoke approx two weeks ago about his career. He told me at the time how happy he was with his personal life- his wonderful wife of 7 years and his two small children. He sounded so proud and it was clear he was exactly where he wanted to be personally.

Surekha, I wish I had been able to meet you. I think we would have met in just 6 weeks at our 20 year bschool reunion. It will be a sad event without Sameer. I am so sad for your loss. I wish I could do something for you and your children to make it easier. My prayers are with you.

Minati Shah

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Sameer was my oldest brother and with me being the youngest in the family at first i was in awe of him and only as i grew older that i began to learn of his intelligence and brilliance. His love for travel and adventure was amazing and inspiring. A story about Sameer that i would like to share , this was about 15-20 years ago, when Sameer was probably in his twenties. My family and I were on our way back from out of town and on our way we see Sameer in the middle of the road, next to broken down bus with a book in his hand, he was calm and collected and we his family in India had not even known he was visiting.

That is how i remember him, always calm, collected, never rushed, taking his time to enjoy everything that life had to offer.

He will be missed!!

Minati

Ana Thompson – Stanford

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When I met Sameer:  09/15/1989

What you remember and appreciated most about Sameer

I remember Sameer in my economics development course with Gerald Meiers. He was always so smart and lively and kept this very established professor on his toes. I admired his persistent and creative intellect.

I am so sorry for this loss and send my condolences to his family.

I read through some of the thoughts already shared and it was nice about the path Sameer had taken.